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    Feeling attractive and desired…

    How aware are you of when you feel attractive and desired? Feeling attractive. It could feel like the most difficult task ever. Or maybe the opposite. It could be very easy for you to feel attractive. Maybe you are a user of our app and just received a challenge to let your partner know what makes you feel attractive, or maybe you just found this post and wanted to read more about attraction and desires. Welcome to you all. The challenge is to become aware of when you feel attractive. What makes you feel attractive. And share it with your partner. Every day for a full week. We do hope…

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    Our agreement

    … I believe that the quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.  Esther Perel As Esther so well puts it in the quote above, the quality of your life can get better if you add more quality to your relationship. We are glad that you have found us and our app. We wish for you to have good quality in your relationships. In this app we focus on your primary romantic relationship. As you are here reading this you seem to take your relationship seriously. And it seems you want to work on it. Improve it. Make it more sustainable. Make it a little bit better every…

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    “in a non-judgmental way”

    As you will find (or already have found) we encourage you very often to listen to your partner while s/he shares something with you. Reflecting together. Listening when someone shares a story from their childhood, an event from the day och their biggest passion. Whatever it is that is being shared, your task is to listen as closely as possible. Without any judging thoughts or remarks. Listen with your curiosity. Listen to really hear not only what is being said, but perhaps how it is being said, if there are any facial expressions, or body language. Take all of that in. And do leave all of your preconceptions at the…

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    The ebb and flow of a relationship

    Do you have the relationship you want? Do you and your partner have the relationship you both want? Do you have the sex life you want? Do you and your partner have the sex life you both want? Do you put time and effort into becoming a better partner? Do you invest time and effort in your relationship? Do you help your partner become a better partner? Do you let your partner help you become a better partner? What steps do you take to become a better lover for your partner? What steps do you let partners help you with so that you become a better lover? How do you…

  • Cards,  Lust and sex

    Fantasies about sex

    To have sexual fantasies is easy for some and more difficult for others. In my sex-talk groups I have met a lot of women who share with the group that they never fantasize. About sex. Never. I usually ask them to give themselves permission to let that part of their erotic intelligence wake up. To fantasize is just like any other super-power. It can be hidden when you want to. No one knows you own it. But it will make you into a better lover. For your self and your partner. Next time you notice something turning you on, do not smash it and shove it under the mental carpet.…

  • Cards,  Lust and sex

    The art of seduction

    Seduction. So easy or so damn difficult? Easier to be seduced, to feel seduced or easier to seduce someone else? Our brain is our biggest sexual organ. Yep. That is, if you like us believe in the erotic intelligence. That you, with your mind and senses, can be seduced and turned on (or off) in the blink of an eye. Or close to that. So how do you become more erotic intelligent? One of the steps is by coming aware of what you like and dislike. What turns you on and off. What your partner like and dislike. Plus be willing to explore these areas together. How you do it?Well,…

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    4 silly questions…

    The questions What’s your favorite animal and why? What’s your second favorite animal and why? What’s your favorite beverage and why? What do you think when you see the sea? The true meaning to the answers Are you ready for the explanations to see the “meanings” that these answers describe? Check them out in the link here or read more below. This game from Mr Bas Klinkhamer is a game using the psychological mechanism of  projection. Question 1 is about the qualities that you appreciate in yourself, and of which you are aware. Question 2 is about qualities you also have, but of which you are less aware – or…

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    Practice gratitude – a tool for you

    To be grateful can be a useful tool in your life. Science suggests that expressing gratitude boosts both your health and spreads happiness around you. Here are a few simple exercises to help you build your capacity for gratitude. We say “thanks” a dozen or more times a day: when someone holds a door open, bags our groceries, puts a report on our desk. It’s a reflex, an unaware reaction to simple daily happenings. We just say it, most often without really acknowledging the person we’re thanking. It is like a routine. Yet as easy as it is to engage in a “thanks—no problem” exchange in our daily routines, we’re…

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    Eye gazing = connection

    Eye gazing is a speedy way to connect with anyone….or not? The New York Times published an article in 2015 describing an experiment in which two people are made to stare into each other’s eyes for four uninterrupted minutes. It’s been theorized that at the end of the four minutes, each person should feel closer and more connected to the other, no matter their relationship to each other prior to the experiment. Inspired by the article, YouTube’s SoulPancake gathered six couples to test out the theory. Among the couples they recruited was a duo on their fourth date and a married couple who’d been together for 55 years. Each couple…

  • Cards,  Lust and sex

    Where did you learn about sex?

    As we grow up in a family, community and society we all receive messages around sex. Some are subtle, others very clear. It is very useful for us all to understand more of where our conceptions, beliefs and thoughts origin from. Once we can see them as not attached to us, maybe also understand why we believe a certain thing, once we can understand and be more aware of where we learned about sex – then we can learn to change our beliefs and thoughts to the ones we would like to have. What messages did you hear in your childhood about sex? Or the opposite…what did you not hear?…