The central part of relationship coaching is your relationship to each other. We start out from your current situation, clarify what you want your relationship to be and help you set up your own goals to achieve just that. Our couples coaching has a forward looking approach with an emphasis on what you want to happen instead of getting stuck in what has been or what has not worked.
To live in a good romantic relationship is strongly connected with your quality of life and good physical shape. However, relationships do not continue to be successful without effort. It is just as important to take care of your relationship as it is to service your car or be physically active. We want everyone to realise the importance of nurturing and prioritising your relationship.
Living in a relationship entails constant work with yourself, becoming more responsive to your partners needs and learning how to express your feelings in different situations. A relationship means that you fuse two lives together to some extent. With couples coaching you get help to discuss problems and challenges that you might meet together. It is a tool to help you both find the best way forward, together.
As a part of couples coaching we also offer “Service” sessions. This is a preemptive style meeting where we evaluate your current situation and give you some tools to stay on track. This can be very useful to regularly revitalise your relationship. Taking you from a good place to a great one. Research shows that this type of session can have positive effects on intimacy, acceptance and satisfaction in your relationship and reduce chances of divorce.
Common reasons for going to Couples coaching
Many couples are hesitant towards getting help as they don’t consider their problems very big. It is something that they feel that they should be able to handle themselves. Such thoughts can go on for a very long time, resulting in a declining relationship quality. Our experience is and research shows that most couples wait too long before getting help. Sometimes so long that repair is almost impossible.
Reaching out for help is a way of taking responsibility. It is a clear and hands on way of taking responsibility, för yourself, your partner and your life together. A romantic relationship needs constant work, otherwise it might decline and lead to poorer communication and connection. Minor matters, that were once quickly resolved, might escalate into serious fights.
Many people choose couples coaching as a way to prevent future problems for that very reason. For others it is a tool to reconnect, a way to find their way back to each other. To get help in understanding and tolerating their differences. Also communicating in a better and more productive way.
We like to make a comparison with virus protection on your computer. It is pointless to install it after you have been infected. So get help in time before disaster strikes.
Hunter & Tess Mabon
How is couples coaching done?
Couples coaching starts with a first meeting where we talk about the current situation and your expectations for the coming sessions. In the sessions the couples must keep an open and honest attitude and intention towards each other, we as your coaches will help you with that. Sometimes there are different expectations within a couple regarding the sessions and their outcome. Our task is to guide you forward even when there are discrepancies.
We prefer to meet for a number of sessions to get some continuity. A big advantage for everyone involved is that we ourselves are in a romantic relationship together. Our knowledge and experiences complete each other and we may very well have been in your situation before.
Initially, we clarify together where you are right now in your relationship, what challenges you are struggling with, how we can strengthen your strengths and what you want to achieve, ie your desired position. We will work with you to determine which parts you need to prioritize and what an arrangement of sessions could look like for the two of you. You decide the goal of the sessions with us – we support you to reach them.
It is often a matter of establishing new habits and ways of being towards each other. And for that, it takes some time and patience to create results. Between our coaching sessions, you often get “homework” to work within your normal everyday life. Based on your specific needs and wishes, we guide you forward through a combination of conversations, exercises and homework with training on your own. Preparing you to stand on your own feet.
In the conversations with us, it is usually a little easier than at home to openly discuss the problems in the relationship, which is the prerequisite for changing the relationship and developing as a couple. The coaching sessions are a safe place to honestly meet your feelings and share your thoughts and the base for moving forward. It is important that you both feel that the contact with us works well.
Finding the right way forward is important!
Couples coaching offers you access to new tools. These tools can give your relationship the nourishment and priority that it needs. When we meet during our coaching sessions, it is like a training opportunity for you. You get to practice the new tools, with the support of us. We can promise that you will learn as much about yourself as you will about your partner. Together with you, we create a plan for how your everyday life can be supported with these tools. In short – we help you create a maintenance plan for the future. We give you the tools to become a better partner in your relationship.
We do not wish that you should come to us as many times as you like. Our job is to give you the help and tools you need to have a good time together going forward. After our initial agreed sessions we often meet the couples with longer intervals. Often to give new inspiration, or just a quick reminder of a tool or a habit.
In our podcast we talk about that there are different recipes for cooking Carbonara. They are all similar and the intention is to create a good meal. But something separates them. We want to give you the tools to master not just one recipe for your Carbonara. We encourage you to find your favorite by trying different recipes.
Hunter & Tess Mabon